I SUCK at writing Thank-You cards! I have meant to write a dozen of them to people who had been helpful during our times of trial and I keep stalling. I am VERY grateful to all of them, but for some reason, it's been hard to write a personal note. I'd rather do a service for them or bring some goodies. That's what I did after my baby shower, and I felt that they benefited more from candy than from a card that would eventually make its way to the rubbish (pardon my British).
After giving it some thought, I realize that it is a question of etiquette: a code of social behavior or conventional norms within a society. Writing Thank-You cards is an important rule of behavior in the United States, but it's not so prevalent in France: the French write Thank-You cards for gifts given at a wedding or for an exceptional occasion, or when the gift was sent by mail. Frankly, I have no recollection of ever seeing my parents write Thank-You notes throughout my childhood. I remember, however, writing a letter of gratitude to my sister who had sent us Christmas and Birthday presents from the States.
Therefore, the concept of writing Thank-You cards for services rendered is new and not customary to me. However, as I intend to spend the rest of my life in the Land of the Free, I need to embrace its Etiquette and stop postponing my duty...especially if I want to keep the good friends I have made thus far in my new Homeland!
3 comments:
Having grown up observing this custom, I am ashamed to admit that I also struggle! I owe countless thank-you cards to people all over. Perhaps I should just wipe the slate clean and do better from now on, but I still think of some very important people who have not known (in writing, anyway) of my gratitude. Alas, one of the many proofs of my imperfection!
I personally think thank you notes are kinda dumb. Really they just end up in the trash and I don't feel like they are sincere a lot of the time because people are just "doing their duty." I like the French way of thank you note writing! Now you know that you never have to feel it is your duty to write me a thank you note- not that I even will ever deserve one but whatever:)
It's only been in the last few years that I've started getting in the habit of writing thank you cards. It is really hard to do, but it always feels good to get them done. Just try to think of what you really appreciate - not just the thing someone did for you, but the person, too. I'm not very good at it, but thinking of it that way tends to help me. :0)
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